A Very Sad Day

Today we mourn the loss of Ian Richardson, one of the greatest television actors of our time. The Englishman was best known for his role as Francis Urquhart. Richardson played the machiavellian chief whip of the British House of Commons in the hugely popular series, House of Cards. We will miss him very much.

The Kingdom Movie Trailer

The Kingdom is the film that brought Jamie Foxx, Jason Bateman, Chris Cooper, and Jeremy Piven to Abu Dhabi. The first trailer was recently released and now available online.

http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/thekingdom.html

I thought it might be good to post the trailer on here, as I previously posted showing off about the cool actors I met. Now you can see how the movie itself has turned out.

It takes place in Riyahd, where the filmmakers never actually went (but Abu Yayha did) and very little was actually filmed in Abu Dhabi. All the same, it will be fun to pick out the actors I've chilled out with and the parts of the city that made it into the film.

It opens in the US on April 20th.

2007

I made that myself.

Haha. Hahaha. I have reached 2007 before my readers in America. I gotta tell you, it looks like a pretty good year so far. I drank a whole bottle of champagne. (I didn't really.)

Happy Holidays!

This is my last post of 2006.

This needs to be special.

Very special.

First, I need to say Happy Holidays to my readers in all corners of the world! I enjoyed a very Merry Christmas here in Abu Dhabi, and hope for a happy new year.

Although there was no snow, I visited Ski Dubai for the first time and was very satisfied by what it had to offer. My family and I were easily the best skiers on the hill. We were blasting down those slopes at speeds the other skiers couldn't even comprehend. Most of the other skiers were visiting from the UK, and had no understanding of the high-speed American sport of skiing. They told me that while there was some skiing in the United Kingdom, "it really isn't all that brilliant," and clearly inferior to that of the States. There are two different ways down the hill: normal and experts. I went down with the experts. The whole thing is pretty strange. With the walls and ceilings, it just seems weird to ski down the slope. After a while, I got used to it, and proved my skill by going 0 to 200 mph in 1.6 seconds. (I made those numbers up)

We've got the cousins from Connecticut visiting us here in Abu Dhabi. They, unlike my fellow bloggers, were not too scared to come here. Our 2006 will be cut short. Because of the time difference, 2006 will be about 8 hours shorter than 2005, as I started it eastern time and am finishing it Abu Dhabi time. What a gip! Oh well. Depending where I am a year from now, I might get a longer 2007 than ever before.

This is the Waldo Files first Christmas. Me and the Waldo Files have been celebrating by listening to Billy Mack's (Bill Nighy's) Christmas tunes and watching excellent Christmas films like Love Actually and Muppet Christmas Carol. I would recommend both. You can find Nighy in the bottom left hand corner. He got famous this summer from playing Davy Jones, but his best performance is clearly in this film. Be sure to watch it.

My Christmas was very nice. I recieved many gifts, and gave lots of...love. While love doesn't cost anything and requires no thought or time to give, it is extremely important and the best gift one can possibly get. I celebrated Christmas at St. Joseph's Church. Maybe I will describe the church in a later post, and maybe I won't. Just wait and see.

~

So now 2006 is at an end. It's been a great year for blogging: lots of wars, peace, initiatives to save people, initiatives to make movies, happiness, sadness, laughter, crying, and of course, plenty of important and thoughtful opinions bouncing around the internet.

~

So what will 2007 bring? Who knows. We'll have to wait and see.

Don't Kill Saddam Initiative: Failure

I regret to inform my loyal readers that the Don't Kill Saddam Initiative has reached mission failure. Not to my surprise, Saddam was hanged early this morning for crimes against Kurds. Don't Kill Saddam Teammates: We have failed.

Although the mission met an overall failure, there were some substantial victories along the way. We have found several allies in our quest to not kill Saddam.

Pope Benedict XVI and his Vatican crew spoke out against the Saddam hanging. They called the execution "tragic" and predicted it would result in only more violence in the Middle East.

Countries such as Italy, Brazil, and Russia also spoke out against the killing.

So even though we've failed in our initiative, at least we know that others have failed too. We've failed together.

Yay!

Horay! It's December 2nd, UAE National Day. It was thiry-five years ago today that Sheikh Zayed bin Sultan al Nayan founded this wondeful nation. That's Sheikh Zayed himself on the picture I made on paint. (Zayed died in 2004.) There's also an Emirates flag, and that other stuff is supposed to be fireworks and a shinging light. Okay, I admit, it's no masterpiece, but I threw it together at the last minute. And its a good thing I'm getting in on the celebration. All the way down the Corniche, there's locals sitting on top of their cars, revving the engines and shooting off the fireworks. Happy birthday, United Arab Emirates.

~

(Note: There has been a high concentration of posts this weekend. I'm catching up on recent apathy. Make sure to read anything you haven't seen yet.)

James Blonde

This is the second post in a day: a first for the Waldo Files. Or at least, the first that I remember. I just felt that there were two really important stories that I needed to give to the world. Is there anything wrong with that? Good! Here we go:

I saw Casino Royale. Very nice film. Daniel Craig had his first outing as James Bond, and did pretty good. He got to ride this delicious Aston Martin on my right, and emerged from the waves in a skin-tight blue speedo. Very sexy. And what's more, there were ladies watching. Do the math. 007+ladies=...let's not go there.

~

The picture was pretty good, especially compared to recent Bond adventures. Even a sexy Irish 007 couldn't keep Halle Berry and invisible cars from destroying everything! Daniel Craig's cars are very visible. They are also very sexy. The creepy Euro baddie was as bad as creepy Euro guys get, and that whole inhaler/bloody eyes business was as sinister as Ernst Stravos Blofeld's pet kitty. Daniel was a pretty swell pick for the role, although Ewan McGregor got the first offer. The Scottish actor politely declined. He suggested that the role would link to his career, and possibly set him up for typecasting in the future. Here's what I don't understand: if he's so scared of these things, why on earth did he do Star Wars? The six-part saga is at least as silly and cheesy as 007! And come on, 007 is actually sexy. That's one thing going for you. Alec Guinness may have made Ben Kenobi sexy, but Ewan? No sir.

~

Daniel really brought sexy back. He fit pretty well into the tailored tux, Aston Martins and over-welming ego. Craig gave us Bond as a man of few words, but as one who enjoys a good kill. Very nice. While his acting was certainly there, the only thing lacking was the presence. It was hard to feel like we were watching James Bond. My solution? Blast Monty Norman's James Bond theme the whole way! That would certainly get the point across. No better way to tell us he's Bond than to stick the guy in front of that magic music for three and a half hours. The only time we actually felt used to his Bond-ness was the final frames when he gives us the sign-off: Bond, James Bond. Then they play the Monty Norman music.

~

They did a good job setting us up for a new series. Bond just got his license to kill, and M turned out to be Judi Dench back then too! Maybe she died, turned into Bernard Lee, and then came back to life again. One really clever move: remaking CIA buddy Felix Lighter into an African-American. Felix's coolest appearance yet.

~

That's all for today. Make sure to stick 007 comments on this post, and Snoop Doggy Dogg comments on the previous one.

Snoop Doggy Dogg: Busted

Snoop Doggy Dogg has been arrested for the third time in three months. What's wrong, Snoop? Just tired of losing air time to artists of lesser greatness like Chamillionaire, or possibly lost in a mid-life crisis? Snoop attempted to smuggle a boton on a plane, (always a big no-no), and now he's got charges full of weapons and narcotics. What gives? Snoop is obviously feeling falling victim to his impulses. Or perhaps, displaying what its like to be a TRUE gansta'. Either way, we're all gonna miss you while you're serving time. But remember: to us, you'll always be the one and only, ego-double-g. Do you want some of this? Snoop's bail has been set at $60,000. Together, we, the proud Snoop Doggy Dogg fans, can chip in and send him back to the streets. Just mail a deposit to my house, and I'll organize it and send it back to Snoop.

US Elections

New Senate:
51 Democrats,
49 Republicans
New House:
230 Democrats,
197 Republicans

Although I'm not exactly fond of Liberals, perhaps a mix-up in Congress may be just what the doctor ordered. A diverse federal government may be the recipe for compromise, working together, and figuring things out.

More news!

The Odd Couple is well on its way. We've already sold out both performances, November 20th and 21st. Look for videos on YouTube. I will be posting them.

Robert and Julia have each returned from their trips to Thailand and Turkey. What fun!

Saddam Hussein: Death Sentence

As many have probably heard, Saddam Hussein was recently sentenced to death by an Iraqi court (which someone I know helped train). Saddam was obviously a criminal. He fed prisoners to lions and collected their shoes. He gased hundreds of innocent civilians based on ethnic backrounds, and invaded Kuwait in 1991. Saddam was the former dictator of the country Judeism was founded, but ran it as a tight Baathist dictatorship. The United States invaded Iraq in 2003 and the rest is history.

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Noone disagrees that Saddam is a crook. Not even him! But here's the snag: the death penalty? Why? We captured him, took away all his dignity, imprisoned him and degraded him to nothing. We occupied his country and set up a new government. Why do we need to kill a man who has nothing left to offer? He has no means of regaining his former status. He has no hope of forgiveness, no chance of escape. What gives a court the right to murder an unarmed man? President Bush refered to the sentence as "a great achievement." If this is why we came into Iraq, I begin to doubt not only our intelligence, but our intentions. This was supposed to be Operation Iraqi Freedom. Why can't we be satisfied by a healthy life sentence?

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And the means of murder seem barbaric as well. Saddam is sentenced to be hanged. Hanging is usually seen as a punishment of the past, a page out of Elizabethian England. Many readers may be surprised to know when the last legal hanging took place in the United States: 1996! It's about time to realize that the death penalty itself is a punishment of the past, a violation of John Locke's, Thomas Jefferson's, and even the United States's unalienable rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Nearly every religion preaches against it. (Iraq itself is the birthplace of Monotheism) People disconnect themselves from what's really going on, forget that these are all real people like themselves, people who long to be forgiven, people who face certain death. Readers, do me one small favor: put yourself in the noose. I'm sure you won't like how it feels.

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'Then Peter came and said to him, "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Until seven times?"

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'Jesus said to him, "I don't tell you until seven times, but, until seventy times seven."'

Urgent-Upgrade to Blogger Beta!

I'm just posting to remind EVERYONE to follow in my own and Smorrison's footsteps and upgrade your blogs. One major reason I find this necessary is that now I cannot comment on any blogs that don't allow anonymous comments. It's also much easier to use, and turns a lame blog into an elite forum.

I also want to address Michard's claim that blogging is a waste of time.

Blogging is by no means a waste of time. This is a permanent online journal. A blogger can look back at this any time in his life, which will remind him who he was and what he was thinking when he wrote it. Publishing writing is never a waste of time. Authors of books like the Bible and the Communist Manifesto changed the world by publishing their work. And as proven by the Waldo SiteMeter, people all over the world can and do read these blogs. In only one day since November 2nd, when the meter was installed, I got hits from Foriegn countries like Taiwan, France, and the United States. Cities like Taipei, Illes de Callais, Washington DC, Carleton Michigan, and Waltham Massachusetts. All in just one day! I hope this will convince people like Michard that blogging is an important medium to express oneself.

I would also like to announce that I am officially a contributor to the HFAC Blog. Perhaps Bilal, Ish and John will also get personal blogs and join our blogring.

Waldo The International Hit

I've recently picked up a SiteMeter, which I encourage readers to visit. It can be found at the bottom of my sidebar. This Meter keeps track of hits, visit, frequencies, and many other things. In my opinion, the most interesting statistic is the country tracker. I've found that only today, (November 2nd) someone from France visited my blog! France! Imagine that. The majority of visits come from the Emirates of course, and I have a few from the U.S. But France really takes the cake. (Haha. Like that Marie Antionnette reference?)

Blogger Beta

As you may have noticed, the Waldo Files are undergoing a series of changes, as we have switched to Blogger Beta.

-Waldo J. Cartridge

HFAC

HAFC is the newest chapter in the life of Waldo J. Cartridge. It's the Harrison Ford Appreciation Club, an organization devoted to the appreciation of Harrison Ford. It's not that I'm a huge fan of Ford or his acting, but more that I can appreciate why one would appreciate him, and understand a common study of his meaning to the world and place in society. I've convinved HFAC to start a blog, and now there is one. It can be found in the HFAC section of my sidebar. Although I am an active contributor to the Blog, the new Blogger Beta doesn't allow established blog accounts, so I started a new one under a false name. It might not say "Waldo", but it is still me inside.

24: Day Six-New Trailer

I'm posting to remind everyone to watch the new trailer for Day 6. It can be found off the 24 link to the right sidebar. Jack's got a great new look for himself-it rather reminds me of some of the people over here. You also get a look at President Wayne Palmer and his new chief of staff Thomas Lennox (played by Peter MacNichol, Bean's host in The Bean Movie.) Chloe, Curtis, Karen Hayes, Bill Buchanan, and Chen Zhi are all back on board, while Graham and the Logans are promised to return. Most of us are waiting for Phillip Bauer, Jack's dad, who's going to be played by James Cromwell, one of my personal favorites. James gained our trust as the simple farmer in Babe, and shocked us all in Blackballs. I've heard that he's also in the remake of The Longest Yard. This is James's second role as a Daddy named Philip this year-he plays Prince Phillip in a film about Lady Di's death. Any way you want to look at it, James will be a fine addition to the splendid Day 6 cast.

My Predictions For Day 6

There's one prediction I recently made that I'd like to share with everyone. It's about Graham-the bluetooth wielding baddy of Day 5. Graham is promised a return, this time with wife and child, Marylin and Josh. My prediction involves the previously unrevealed last name that goes with "Graham." My guess:

Bauer.

I picked up on a few things that might prove to be Day 6's big surprise. Graham's last name was hidden, never revealed, possibly on purpose. Why else would his name be concealed unless we were in for a surprise? Graham also never interacted with anyone save Charles Logan-noone else even knows he exists. But the real clue is what I saw on Day 6's wikipedia. It claims that Josh was previously believed to be Jack's young relation, but is know revealed as Graham's son. Maybe he's both...and James's new character could be the key to unravelling the mystery. I know this pick might be all tosh, but it's definitely something to think about in these long months before January.

Everyone watch the trailer!

Eid Mubarak!

Os-sallam al-akkum!

Ramadan is over. It is now Eid, the Muslim Christmas-type happiest time of year. No work or school for a week and no more fasting for a whole year.

By now, I've already been in Abu Dhabi far longer than Abu Yahya was in Iraq. What's his measly three months to my three and a half? Gotcha "Abu Yahya!" Who's the best Middle Eastern diplomat now? Huh? Huh? That's what I thought! Fa-sheezi!

Speaking of travel, my brother Robby will be departing for Thailand very shortly. My sister Julia leaves for Turkey next week. I'm expecting a trip to Shanghai sometime this year but I can't count on it.

The James Bond YouTube Video seems to be doing very well. We plan to update it with the continuation of the story. Special thanks to actors Albert, Hugh, and Fareed, they were very willing to be posted on the world wide web.

There's a new blog in the links list...it's RobFashizzle installment 2! This time, he's using his other name, Elihu. (Did anyone know Robby's middle name was Elihu? He's named after a famous ancestor.) Feel free to visit DJ Elihu sometime in the near future. I'd also like to remind you all to visit Joe's Place as well.

Massa il khair!

-Waldo Bin Michael Al Cartridge

James Bond

Today I found the greatest movie I've ever seen on YouTube.com. I can't wait to share this brilliant piece of filmmaking with everyone in the USA.

Best Director-Results

And The Waldo Goes To...
Mel Gibson!

Mel Gibson walked away with a Waldo after the online votes hailed him king. Mel won by majority vote, and I was not needed to break a tie. Everything seemed to go pretty smoothly as the first Waldo was awarded last night.

But maybe it was a bit too smooth. For an award given to a man like Mel, there was little intensity or vigor. Some bloggers even refused to vote! Imagine that. I want to make it clear that my nominees will not always be the best choices. That's why write-in votes can be used whenever nessecairy.

I also found it just a tad distressing that the Waldo Awards were plagerized by two bloggers I trusted pretty well. The Waldos are the Waldos. There are no other awards like them. Better than them? Perhaps. But the same? No. That's why I found it odd that Smorrison and Michard's posts seemed so familiar. Maybe in the future we can try harder to think up more original posts.

WALDO'S TAKE

I'm sure some people are wondering, "Hey, what did Waldo think about the results?" Well, even if you weren't wondering, I'm going to answer.

If I could have chosen the winners...

I might have ordered the nominees like this:

1. Orson Welles

2. Alfred Hitchcock

3. David Lean

4. Mel Gibson

However, all of the nominees were fine choices. Even if my desicion would have been different, Mel's win made my lot a lot easier. Gibson was much less difficult to track down than any of the other nominees, considering they've all passed away.

Watch out for the next award!

Waldo Awards-Best Director

The Waldo Awards kick off to a great start this year, featuring an interactive system: the winner is completely decided by online votes! I'll only vote in case of a tiebreaker, so the rest is up to you.

BEST DIRECTOR

Here's some nominees to get you started on this year's first award. Choose carefully!


ORSON WELLES

Possibly the greatest director of all time, Orson Welles broke all the rules and made all the new ones in his historic film debut, Citizen Kane. Only 25 when he directed Kane, Welles had some trouble living up to his self-set standards. Welles ended up obese, out of the spotlight, and with a pretty funky looking beard. It's hard to judge a career that couldn't live up to its debut...but then again, no other director has ever topped it. Even still, without Orson Welles, modern cinema would be a very, very different thing. It's hard to say he isn't at least Hollywood's greatest innovator to date.

DAVID LEAN

The director of Lawrence of Arabia, Doctor Zhivago, Great Expectation, Passage to India, and Bridge on the River Kwai, David Lean was the giant of film from the 1960s to the 1970s. Boasting Oscar nods to burn and a flare for spectacle, Lean was famous for long, powerful epics and biopics. But his name is also inseparable from that of Alec Guinness. In fact, the Oscar winner (for a Lean film) starred in every one of the films mentioned above. Lean also had the attendency to drag, much of his work lasting above and beyond the four hour mark. The ending of films such as Lawrence seemed abrupt and disappointing. But the films themselves could never disappoint. Entertaining at their worst, Lean's movies will prove to last well beyond the present generation. A taste for long, long epics, working with similar casts and crews, but a tad shabby on the endings. So who's the new age David Lean? Possibly Peter Jackson.

MEL GIBSON

Although he's been caught up in recent controversy for drunken comments, Mel Gibson is undoubtably one of the iconic filmmakers of our time. With 1995's Braveheart he even won media success, earning an Oscar for both Best Picture and Director. And with the unforgettable Passion of the Christ in 2004, Gibson rose to international and even spiritual success. One of the more ambitious projects to date, Gibson filmed the last 12 hours of Jesus's life in Aramaeic, the long forgotten language the Palestinians actually spoke in 33 AD. And now he promises to surprise us all with Apocalypto, an ancient Mexican epic completely in the long lost language of the Mayans. So even if everyone doesn't agree with his strange personal beliefs, there is little doubt Mel Gibson certainly knows what he's doing and how to do it.

ALFRED HITCHCOCK

The name of Alfred Hitchcock, master of suspense, is one nearly synonymous with that of modern cinema. Hitchcock's most memorable films include North By Northwest, Rear Window, Vertigo, The Foriegn Correspondent, and Psycho. A distinct style and artistic taste give Hitchcock the right to call himself the Master of Suspense, and is all the better for the often mesmorized audience. Hitchcock himself made sure to cameo in every single one of his films. Others make sure to watch them all. Although 0 for 5 at the Academy Awards, Hitchcock has earned a name for himself that goes beyond any presented prize. Will the Waldo do more honor for this man than the Oscar ever could?

A NOTE FROM WALDO

I apologise that a picture of Gibson and Hitchcock was unavailable, but Blogspot often limits file size. I now leave the desicion to you...who to choose? If you find these nominees unsuitable, another option is the write-in vote. However, the write-in must pass my veto and recieve at least three votes. Some answers are just unacceptable, such as:

*Steven Spielburg
*George Lucas
*Michael Moore
*Oliver Stone
*John Chambers

These answers will be guarenteed not to pass my veto. I suggest choosing from the nominees, but I want to leave the options open.

Good luck voting!

Some Very Special News

RAMADAN

It's the holy month of Ramadan, the celebration of the revelation of the Quaran from the angel Gabriel to the Prophet Mohammed. This also means fasting from sunrise to sunset for all Muslims. Even non-Muslim Arabs are expected to refrain from eating outside the home, so people like me can rule out a fast food stop or sip of water anywhere a fasting Muslim might be. This is really quite the sacrifice, partially because Arabic food is so delicious.

Ramadan also means shorter work and school days here in the UAE.


INTERNET
I'm now connected to the world wide web!

More posts!

More comments!

More Waldo J. Cartridge!

This also means that the Waldo Awards will be resumed before long. I apologise for the hiatus (look it up), it seems as though I hadn't timed them wisely. But now that I'm all settled in, I can resume coverage of more trivial matters. I'll also warn you all to look out for Waldo in the acting awards...all 61 of my lines will be uttered with perfection.

Everyone should also notice the addition of "Joe's Place", a new blog on my sidebar. Joe is happy to join the blog world and we should all be appreciative of his well-timed coming.

24

Speaking of trivial matters, I've now finished all four previous seasons of 24. That's 96 episodes. This has led to an even more intense inpatience for Season 6. It looks like it's going to be the best ever. James Cromwell has recently been cast as Jack's father!

11:59:59,...11:59:58,...11:59:59,...

12:00:00.